Identifying Parenting Styles and Their Associated Parent-Child Communication Patterns from an Islamic Perspective: A Qualitative Study

Introduction and Objectives:  Parenting styles play a foundational role in shaping children’s personality, identity, mental health, social well-being, and socio-moral development. In mainstream Western literature, parenting styles are typically classified into four categories—authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved (neglectful)—centered primarily on two dimensions: responsiveness (support) and demandingness (control). Parental responsiveness relates to the emotional quality of the parent-child relationship and is characterized by behaviors such as demonstrating acceptance, emotional availability, and affective responsiveness. Demandingness encompasses both behavioral and psychological control: behavioral control refers to parents’ efforts to manage or regulate their children’s conduct, while psychological control involves parents’ attempts to manipulate their children’s thoughts, feelings, and emotions. Parent-child communication patterns are shaped by parenting styles and include the ways expectations are expressed, behaviors are responded to, conflicts are resolved, and intimacy and dialogue are fostered. However, existing parenting theories are not fully congruent with the Islamic perspective. Islamic parenting (tarbiya) emphasizes principles such as spirituality, respect, self-regulation, divine orientation, and a gradual approach to child-rearing. Although numerous studies have examined the dimensions and outcomes of Islamic parenting, a systematic and well-structured model delineating parenting styles and their corresponding parent-child communication patterns—based on developmental stages and grounded entirely in authentic Islamic texts—has yet to be developed. The primary aim of the present study was to identify parenting styles from an Islamic perspective and the parent-child communication patterns associated with them. Accordingly, the study sought to answer the following two questions:

What are the principal parenting styles from an Islamic perspective?
What are the parent-child communication patterns corresponding to these styles across different developmental stages?

Method: This study employed qualitative thematic analysis, following Stirling’s model. Thematic analysis is a systematic method for identifying, examining, and reporting patterns (themes) within qualitative data. The data sources comprised the Qur’an and the corpus of ḥadīth narrated from the Maʿṣūmūn (the Infallibles), with emphasis on authoritative sources from both the Shīʿī and Sunnī traditions. Because the ḥadīth literature is extensive, the narrations contained therein address diverse subjects, and their citation varies in terms of authenticity, three authoritative ḥadīth compilations meeting the following criteria were first selected, and the relevant ḥadīths were extracted from them. The criteria for source selection were: (1) the narrations and verses had to be related to the subject of parent-child interaction; (2) the source had to be authored by a researcher with expertise in ḥadīth studies and Islamic studies; and (3) the themes of parent-child interaction addressed had to be comprehensive. Subsequently, to supplement the data, additional material was retrieved by searching for keywords such as walad (child/offspring), wālid (parent), banī (sons/children of), bint (daughter), ghulām (boy/young servant), ṣabī (boy), and ṣabiyya (girl) in the specialized software programs Nūr al-Tafāsīr, Nūr al-Aḥādīth, and the Library of Islamic Jurisprudence and Ethics, drawing on both Shīʿī and Sunnī ḥadīth sources. Data were collected through theoretical sampling, and the analytic process included in-depth reading of the texts, extraction of meaningful units, coding, construction of basic themes, organization of themes, and derivation of overarching themes. To ensure the trustworthiness and validity of the qualitative data, several strategies were employed: (1) repeated examination of sources and meaningful expressions; (2) constant, continuous comparison between the data and the emerging themes; (3) dual coding conducted by two researchers; and (4) use of multiple sources for data extraction.
Findings: Data analysis revealed two principal components of parenting derived from the Islamic texts: (1) opportunity-granting and (2) demandingness. The extent to which each of these components is employed—based on authoritative Islamic ḥadīths—may range from intense to minimal, depending on the child’s circumstances and age period. By combining these two components across the child’s age periods, from birth to twenty-one years, five principal Islamic parenting styles corresponding to the child’s developmental stages were identified; subsequently, the parent-child communication pattern associated with each parenting style was determined.

Release Parenting Style (birth to 6 or 7 years): In this style, parental opportunity-granting is very high while demandingness is very low. The corresponding parent-child communication pattern is the submissive communication pattern.
Demanding Parenting Style (7 to 14 years): In this style, parental demandingness is very high while opportunity-granting is very low. The corresponding parent-child communication pattern is assertive communication.
Disciplinary Parenting Style (14 to 16 years): In this style, both parental demandingness and opportunity-granting are very high. The corresponding parent-child communication pattern is the accompanying-and-guiding pattern.
Consultative Parenting Style (16 to 18 years): In this style, parents employ opportunity-granting and demandingness at a moderate level. The corresponding parent-child communication pattern is participatory communication.
Detachment Parenting Style (18 to 21 years): In this style, both parental opportunity-granting and demandingness are very low. The corresponding parent-child communication pattern is conciliatory communication.

Discussion and Conclusion: The present study demonstrates that the Islamic model of parenting emphasizes flexibility in the parent-child relationship in accordance with the child’s developmental stage. Early childhood is characterized by freedom of action, play, and maximal acceptance, during which parents are, in effect, submissive toward the child. As the child matures, demandingness and principled, disciplinary instruction progressively replace this submissiveness. During adolescence, parenting—based on its successive sub-stages—comprises three distinct styles: the first emphasizes discipline accompanied by reasoning and demandingness; the second centers on dialogue, consultation, and participation; and the final style gives due attention to independence and responsible distancing. The findings of this study differ from comparable studies in several respects: (1) Distinction in objective—the aim of the present study was to identify the constituent components of Islamic parenting styles and to present styles corresponding to each age period; (2) Distinction in the classification of developmental periods—based on Islamic narrations, the present study divided the age span into five stages; (3) Distinction in the parenting styles identified—the present study identified five distinct parenting styles; (4) Distinction in method—the present study’s methodology was grounded in thematic analysis following Stirling’s model. This model depicts the transition of the parental role across the communication patterns of submission, assertiveness, accompaniment, consultation, and detachment. Islamic parenting, in accordance with the findings of this study, can guide Muslim parents’ approach to interacting with their children. Future research is recommended to focus on validating and standardizing Islamic parenting styles and comparing them across diverse socio-cultural contexts.
Acknowledgments: I wish to express my gratitude to the Research Institute of Hawza and University and to the Islamic Sciences and Culture Academy for their support of this study.
Conflicts of Interest: The present study has no conflicts of interest.